Wednesday, August 03, 2005

The Euro English

Note: This is a forwarded e-mail from a friend, sa halip na iforward, ipinost ko na lang dito, ok ba? wala lang.

The Euro English

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.

As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English".

In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.

There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.

In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.

By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".

During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.

Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas.

If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl


Ethel said...

Hehehe...cguro kung nanalo ang YES sa new EU referendum malamang totoo 'to lol's joke 2x lang :)
Haaay naku kung may english lang dito sa amin malamang may trabaho na ako:) tatanda na ata ako sa kakaaral ng lengwahe dito, French, German at Luxembourgoise pweeh... ang hirap pa naman! Ewan ko ba, bat nga yong "W" naging "v" tsaka yong "F" naging "v" pati pa puter ko German at French, buti nlang nagkaintindihan pa rin kami :) kaya 'to nakapagblog pa rin lol's, kaya 'kaw Mar, kung balak mong pumunta dito sa Europe mag aral ka muna dyan ng French at German bibisahan kita ngeyaaahhh :)

kukote said...

uy! bibisahan daw ako!!!! nabasa nyo yan ha... kayo testigo... hehehe. marunong nako ng french...

deja vu!

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mei said...

wahaha! nabasa ko na to pero natatawa pa rin ako! :)