Friday, November 04, 2005

love me or hate me

now i'm blogging again... dito sa batangas. sa lahat ng nakabasa ng dalawang nakaraang post ko which i removed here, pasensya na po. actually, hindi ko sya dinilete, it is still saved in my account as drafts... itinago ko na lang. pasensya na po sa mga nakabasa, it's just me, naglabas ng sama ng loob, and now it's gone.

i don't want to sound like a preacher here now... pero siguro, magiging parang ganun. just want to share some thoughts i learned while reading the bible... actually, di ko pa sya nababasa lahat, matthew pa nga lang yung nabasa ko eh, na minsan ko lang nabasa minsang nabagot ako sa hotel sa davao. pero kahit minsan lang ako nagbasa, ilang chapter lang nung matthew... may natutunan ako. something na naishare ko na rin dito, pero gusto kong ulitin... ano yun? yung love your enemies. yung sabi ni christ... wala kang ipinagkaiba sa masamang tao kung ang mahal mo lang ay yung mga taong nagmamahal sa iyo, dahil ganun din sila. ang kaibahan ng tunay na cristiano, yung kahit kaaway mo, mahal mo. talagang tinamaan ako nung mabasa ko ito.. oo nga naman. kahit yung mga masasamang tao, mahal din nila yung mga nagmamahal sa kanila, and they hate people that hate them. so, pareho lang tayo if we cannot love our enemies.

so what's my point. kung napadpad kayo kahapon dito, well, nabasa nyo how furious i was. kung kaharap ko lang yung taong yun... sabi nga nung isa dyan, nabugbog ko na sya and worse, mapatay ko... sa tindi ng galit ko. buti na lang at hindi ko kaharap. now, after doing some thinking, after ko makausap yung taong involved... everything has changed. kung sya nga na biktima, ipinagpasa Dyos na nya yung lahat, ako pa ba ang hindi makakagawa nun? oh... kahangalan... siguro, yan ang nasa isip nyo. someone raped her and ipagpasa Dyos na lang ang lahat? for us, initial reaction talaga is to take revenge... ipakulong at ipabitay. after that, ano? masaya na ba ako? masaya na ba kami? i don't think so.

ipagpasa Dyos na lang ang lahat. may mangyayari kaya? i never doubted the power of God. ang dami ko nang ipinagpasaDyos. at nasaan na sila ngayon? kapag Dyos ang kakampi mo, wala silang magagawa. kapag sinumpa ka na ng Dyos, ikaw na ang pinakakawawang tao sa mundo. hindi ko hinihiling na gawin Nya yun.... desisyon Nya what is best for them. Ang masasabi ko lang, kelanman, di pa ako binigo ng Dyos... He took revenge for me. pinagtawanan nila ako, niloko nila ako, asan sila ngayon? hindi ba sila nagtataka na parang sinumpa sila? lahat na lang na pasukin nilang negosyo, bumabagsak, apply ng apply, hindi magtagal sa isang trabaho? malas lang ba o dahil ipinagpasaDyos ko na sila? ewan ko, hindi ako banal, nagkakasala din ako... pero ang kaibahan ko sa iba, may Dyos na gumagabay sa akin, pumapalo kapag nagkakamali ako at tumutulong sa mga pangangailangan ko.

ngayon ko lang sasabihin ito. just to show you kung totoo yang sinasabi ko... minsang nagkamali ako... pinalo Nya ako. this is true... ang totoong dahilan kung bakit nabangga ang kotse ko last June... which served as an eye opener for me... na parang sinabi nya... marhgil, gumising ka, naliligaw ka na ng landas. you might think it as a coincidence... pero sa akin... talagang pinalo Nya ako. three days before nabangga yung kotse ko... i made a serious offense... siguro dala na rin ng kahinaan ko at tukso... lumabas kami ng barkada ko.... nagpunta sa quezon ave... namick-up ng babae... at alam nyo na. well, i practiced safe sex... it was my first time na gumamit ng bayarang babae, and after that, guilty talaga ako, sabi ko sa sarili, di na ito mauulit. and 3 days after that, hayun nga, nabangga yung kotse ko sa south super highway. coincidence? i don't think so. pinagsisihan ko talaga yung kasalanan kong yun at kahit gaano siguro kagandang pokpok ang iharap nyo sa akin, never ko nang gagalawin.

naalala ko tuloy ang biro sa akin ng mga officemates ko... "ang higpit naman ng Dyos nyo... magkasala ka lang, may parusa ka kaaagad." because alam nila, totoo, gumawa ako ng kasalanan, may nangyayaring kakaiba. hindi lang isang beses nangyari yan. ayoko na lang ikwento yung iba.

tama na. mahaba na ito. parang sermon na sa isang misa. ngayon, mas kilala nyo na ako. love me or hate me? i don't care.

yun lang.

15 comments:

ka uro said...

amen to what you said about the bible especially about loving one's enemies. nagkakamali tayong lahat dahil tao lang tayo. minsan natatangay tayo ng ating mga damdamin. lalo na kung may nagpagalit sa atin, ang unang reaction natin is to get even, ang gumanti. oo, natural human reaction lang yon pero katulad nga ng "love your enemy" na nakasaad sa biblia, hindi natural reaction yon. there are times that we have to go beyond our being human. si jesus ang nagbigay sa atin ng perfect example. ang tularan siya kahit sa maliliit na bagay sa ating araw-araw na interaction sa kapwa natin ay isang pagpapatunay ng ating pananampalataya sa kanya. God bless you Marhgil!

farawayme said...
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farawayme said...

Marami na tayong ups and down...pero heto pa din tayo...nagkakaroon man ng problema pero...di pa rin natitibag...nagkakaroon ng tampuhan...sama ng loob, pero lahat ng iyon, nalampasan natin...kahit na magkalayo tayo ngayon. Marami pang pagsubok na darating...sana malampasan pa rin natin. After reading your post...walang nagbago...ang mahalaga pinagsisihan mo na un at di na uulitin pa. Walang Iwanan...no matter what happens.

Janix said...

walang problema

mei said...

na-shock ako sa mga nabasa ko. hindi dahil sa mga sinabi mo, kungdi dahil nagawa mong sabihin lahat yon. that only means you're man enough to admit your weakness, at di lahat ng tao kaya gawin yun. saludo ako sa'yo marhgil! pagpalain ka!

kim said...

kahit ano pa ang sabihin nila hanga ako sa iyo.

mildred said...

ang sweet naman..! after reading your post and Shella's tag here, now i can feel that there's a taste of honey that has her wanting and loving you more.

Sa totoo lang Marhgil, this is gonna be my first time to say something..... not only to you but to her as well. Why? it's relevant to your post. Loving my enemies? No, have we been..? I believe not. But for Shella, yes..! coz she has said so much in her previous post "against me" in her old blog, to the point of calling me "BIGAON" (which Nao translated to me in their own dialect as "MALANDI"). And you know what malandi means right..? But did I say something back against her..? I don't remember, not even once..! Sinabihan ako ni Nao na 'wag ng pansinin. Ang terms nga na ginamit ni Nao sa'kin that time is "arbor ko na lang 'yang incident na 'yan sa'yo friend..!"

And i guess she said that to you kasi lagi raw kayong nag-uusap sa phone..!

Now let me share something to both of you and Shella. You two can get your point across if you both stay cool calm and collected as young happy couple..! Now since both of you were into blogging you need to balance it with some fun keeping your relationship in check..! Kung may bumira man sa'yo Marhgil o may maging "sweet" paminsan minsan (lalo na maraming kang beauties na kasama sa KALUSKOS diba? Shella (as a girlfriend) should watch how others behave in certain situations too lalo na dito sa blogging, kung talaga bang lumalandi or hindi naman. She can enjoy her freedom to view the coin but please make sure to see the other side of it too. Sometimes kasi, ang IMAHINASYON natin ang s'ya ring kumukotkot ng ating mapag-imbot na diwa. The bible says, Proverbs 6:18 A heart that deviseth "wicked imaginations" can kill, a feet that be swift in running to mischief. And also here in Romans 1:21 "Because that, when they knew God, they glorified him not as God, neither were thankful; but became vain in their imaginations, and their foolish heart was darkened.."

The idea is - our imagination, if not always in check, can run wild. From our imagination we can kill, steal and destroy..! The ways of the flesh are opposite to the ways of the spirit.

Like you.. nagmisa na rin ata ako dito..?

Well, here's to a happy couple -you and Shella..! I pray that things will get a lot better for both of you this time. Remember, a forgiving spirit could result in a permanent union. From the heart, GOODLUCK TO BOTH OF YOU..!

Ethel said...

Hello Tito,
Ngayon lang ako napunta dine nagloko kasi puter ko mga ilang days.
Napaka honest mo talaga, ngayon mas lalo na kitang kilala :)
All things work together for good to those who love.
Happy weekend ma friend.

darlene said...

Vengeance is not ours, it's God's.

Im glad you're okay now.

Naomi said...
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Naomi said...
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Naomi said...

let me lift a short passage on my then post:

"They say it takes a minute to find an enemy, an hour to hate them, a day to overcome them, but an entire life not to forget the scarce.."

Love your enemy? In my case? i don't think so. Especially if that enemy became my reel or real friend.

Saint Eroica said...

ako naman... di ako pahuhuli kasi mayabang ako. i can't ride with all the religious passages bec as you know my dear friend, i'm an agnostic (wala ng aangal kasi ako nga rinerespeto ko mga beliefs nyo...). pero lemme just say that whatever you say or express is just your own opinion. kaya nga may blogging kasi we just jot down our own moments (in cyber space). if you have offended someone (intentionally or not, that's yours to deal with it or not.) my opinion, don't deal with it. pabayaan mo sila maghimutok. remember the art of war??? ako ganun, i hit in silence. vengeance is always sweet if you have a strong stand for it, pero kung christian ka, i guess follow their teachings na lang. basta ang akin, galawin nyo ako, at gagalawin ko din ko kayo basta TYPE ko kayong patulan. and yes marhgil, di ako nahihiyang sabihin na mayabang ako. mas madami na akong pinag daanan na di nyo madadaanan. as a friend, i'm just here to help you. at least true friend ako.

velvet said...

hey! hey! my namiss ako. hindi ko nabasa 'yung previous post. tsk, tsk, tsk. pero okay lng. :D

anyway, its an echo of comments already. and what can say.... saludo ako syo!

Bluegreen said...

Opinion lang po ito ha...pero tingin ko, wala connection yung pagka bangga ng car mo dun sa nangyari previously. Maaaring may ibang ipinapahiwatig dun. Bakit ko nasabi yon? kasi po, the fact na na-guilty ka na at nagsisi sa ginawa mo, I don't think God is that heartless para paluin ka pa hehehe. Kasi pag sincere na pagsisisi yon, right there, forgiven na eh. I believe God doesn't punish us for our sins in that way. Ang pinaka-punishment po natin ay yung pag-atake na ng conscience. At pag guilty tayo, we tend to go away from Him, parang suddenly may wall in between. And that is the punishment of sin, separation from Him. Sorry nag-preach pa ko hehehe..just providing a different view of things.


God bless!

"A broken spirit and a contrite heart, God will not despise..."